drinking to trust like sweet nothings

Another night, another drink, and a casual conversation with a close friend as we analyze mistakes perhaps, our rough and uncivil moments; those which break us pass a limit, those which have made grown men cry, those which force us to rebuild almost each and every aspect of what we feel. Through out this night something so simple as trust came to mind; a sentence of a particular habit which I seem to ignore at times.. Giving my trust away.

"Trust is not given, it's earned, you were just so blinded by everything that you gave your trust and heart away." - A Close Friend



Honestly, I am indeed guilty of this on many occasions, perhaps even so far as elementary school. I recall bringing a valued possession in for show and tell, and leaving it around on my desk, trusting and perhaps a little naive, I had returned only to see it stolen completely.

I'm not sure what it has always been with me; from things of materialistic value to even my own heart. Funny how circumstances are always different; brunette with honestly gorgeous green eyes, beautiful curves, soft skin, and that perfect smile. That smile... Unfortunately it always seems to get me and the most entertaining part would be me passing off my trust as if I were quarterbacking to a super bowl touch down. Damsels in distress; preying like lions on a gazelle awaiting to feast, and I'm that gazelle because it's taken so much for me to understand and realize that others should be working for my trust just as I work for theirs.

What can I say though, I've never been much of a hopeless romantic in situations of sort, but more of a "helpless" one. Though with lessons learned, I keep my guard up, my armor, even when they strip it all away and I'm left nude and ashamed. I doubt another person will be able to get in, not this time, not for awhile.

"sweet loving, sweet nothing, sweet like the taste of a cherry tree, though I'm so blinded by the taste to understand the tree was rotting.." - Ryan D.