the fall

"it was pride that made angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels." - Saint Augustine

There was a young man, or shall we say boy; who lived a "microwave aged" life. Cash earned was cash spent, life was placed in a "fast lane" motion, he felt untouchable; always daring for someone to cross his path. He was loyal to his friends and family; the type of loyalty that would earn someone who offends a trip to the hospital and a knee brace, violence was second nature, pride was everything, respect and humility were misunderstood. Pride was everything to him, he lived and breathed a lifestyle which would only lead to the bottom.

Along came a girl; the story eventually sets itself up for love, passion, certain attributes that take course in a relationship, though all of it a volcano waiting to erupt. Friends are lost, family ignored, ideals have changed, pride still lingers, and a child is born. Though a father, still a boy. Scraping around to make ends meat, unable to cope with the stresses of life, unable to understand humility, pride takes root, a relationship is broken, and a child lives two separate lives. Though not the ending; but rather the beginning, the beginning of a boy to a man.

You see this boy had lost everything; he was several thousands in debt in not only currency of the pocket but currency of his soul as well. No path of reconstruction was set forth, no trail was meant to lead up, nothing but a broken heart, broken dreams, "A life torn to pieces.." he would mutter. He would continually blame himself over and over, he had no love for himself to begin with, so how could he learn to love a woman or let alone anyone else? He couldn't, his actions reflected his feelings, his feelings were nothing close to love, he acted like an ass; an ass towards his family, an ass towards someone he cared about so much..

Rock Bottom-The culmination of a descent to a place where a person has nothing left to lose in terms of possessions, status, wealth and perhaps even shelter, food and warmth as a result of self-destructive behavior.(via Wikipedia)

There are only two paths to take when you've finally hit rock bottom; the first: to climb, climb back up, realize truth over lies, rebuild yourself, resolve yourself, adapt and overcome all the trouble and become better than you were before.. The second: simply put, fail, fail to the point you're unable to take it anymore, to the point where you're not shy of a bullet to the heart.

Funny how when you've got your back against the wall you find the help in the most unlikely people. People who secretly have had relating chapters in their lives and have come out of it with their chest up; walking tall. Friends you never would have expected that choose to stand by you, and family that understand the duty and faith of blood. In these people this boy was able to grow into a man and continue to grow morally in his heart and soul.

I find it strange how a course of certain events can change a boy to a man, change one's life completely around, starting from absolute rock bottom. This young boy developed some kind of appreciation and understanding for certain attributes a human should have such as love and humility, allowing him to become a better person; a man. No more high and mighty pride, no more anger, no more disgust, never a judge, respect for everyone, jealousy nonexistent, self aware and disciplined, faith built, morally obligated, accepting of everyone though careful of the company kept, back never turn, and humility found.

Now the story doesn't end for this young man; there's no happy ending, no damsel in distress saved, no treasure found, just a continued goal to be a better person. Challenges arise for him each and every day, and it's all a matter of choosing to do things the right way over the easy, choosing to climb higher versus slipping down, choosing to push forward even when you're tired, even when the burden of the world overcomes you, you just take the next step forward..

"You've got to be more humble son.." - My Father

"don't regret anything you've been through; if it didn't happen, you would never be the same person you are now, there's purpose in our mistakes and faults, there's purpose in our fears and doubts, there's purpose in our failures." - Ryan D